Today is Mother’s Day.
Regarding Nannies would like to wish all the moms out there a very happy day surrounded by those you love and those who love you.
I thought you would enjoy a few humorous tidbits from a very special mother, the late, great Erma Bombeck.
Erma Bombecks’ Parenting Advice:
“He who laughs…..lasts.”
“Insanity is hereditary. You can catch it from your kids.”
—”When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he’s doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911. “
“When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.”
“Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.”
Erma Bombecks’ Observations on Life and Motherhood :
“Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.”
“Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?
“Once you get a spice in your home, you have it forever. Women never throw out spices. The Egyptians were buried with their spices. I know which one I’m taking with me when I go. “
“All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. “
“I love my mother for all the times she said absolutely nothing…. Thinking back on it all, it must have been the most difficult part of mothering she ever had to do: knowing the outcome, yet feeling she had no right to keep me from charting my own path. I thank her for all her virtues, but mostly for never once having said, “I told you so.”
“I don’t know why no one ever thought to paste a label on the toilet-tissue spindle giving 1-2-3 directions for replacing the tissue on it. Then everyone in the house would know what Mama knows.”
“The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one
Erma Bombecks’ Words of Wisdom
“If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.”
“”Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what.”
“Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere”
“Don’t confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.”
“Dreams have only one owner at a time. That’s why dreamers are lonely.”
“”When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.”
“When you look like your passport photo, it’s time to go home.”
“Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.”
To all you moms out there: thanks for all you do!
Enjoy your day.