I have spent the past 15 years working with divorced families. No divorce is easy, however, there are certain things you can do as a nanny to make this difficult time less stressful for the children while still maintaining a professional relationship with the parents.
- Always remember that you are there for the children. Their safety, well-being and comfort come first.
- You are not there to be the new best friend of your boss, a sounding board for all things wrong with their spouse or to bear the brunt of the frustrations they are having with each other.
- While tempers may rise, do not allow name calling or negative talk of the other spouse while children are present. Also, don’t allow other family members or friends to do so in the presence of the children. Children pick up on the feelings and tone of parents, and little ears become big listeners when they know it’s something they aren’t supposed to hear.
- Do not let yourself become the messenger between parents, and don’t allow the children to relay messages either. While they may not be able to communicate with each other, this isn’t about them. It’s about their children and their needs. Create a system of emails that consistently remind parents of upcoming appointments, events and obligations.
- Maintain two separate households. Have clothing, shoes, toiletries, medications, etc. in each home. School bags and sports equipment can go back and forth. While it may be added work to maintain these in both homes, it does come in handy for those last minute changes in location or when an emergency arises.
by Kellie Geres
Regarding Nannies Development Team